Sunday, May 28, 2006

Random Musings from a Day at the Park


Took my baby daughter to her first Phils game today. We missed the entire first inning. Why? After taking our $10 for parking, the good people from Comcast Spectacor forced us to park amongst the corn and cattle in Lancaster County. For $10, the fiscal rapists who manage that charade should offer a shuttle service to those they force to park west of Reading (especially elderly fans, expectant mothers, and those travelling with young children). Hey, maybe Young Jebediah can borrow Pa's horse & buggy for the next homestand and make some extra dough so he can get some phat rims (those wooden spoked dillys don't attract the Amish lasses like they used to).

Got a Water Ice upon entering Citizens Bank Park. It sucked. I think I could've used a chisel...no, a jackhammer...to get it to the right consistency...The beer man was peddling Coors Light for $5.75. And people actually paid good, hard-earned money for that bottled urine (assuming they weren't PennDot workers, in which case the money spent was hardly hard-earned). Look, I've said it before, and I'll say it again: if you're gonna take it in the dunghole to the tune of $5 or more per beer, you might as well cough up the extra 50 cents and get one of those nice microbrews...

When Ryan Howard went yard, the place erupted so loud that it scared the crap out of my little girl. The last time I saw someone bawl like that was David Hasselhoff. No, Frank Robinson...

The Phillie who received the loudest ovation at the plate? Aaron Rowand (and deservedly so)...In the field, I saw Sal Fasano dive after two foul balls. Does anyone ever remember seeing Mike Lieberthal dive ONCE (or even slide into second base, for that matter)? It is a crime that Lieberthal keeps cashing paychecks to the tune of $9 million or so a year. Grand theft...lock him up and keep starting Sal!!!

Thankfully, the Chickie & Pete's Crab Fries line was more or less nonexistent. They moved the Crab Fries stand over to the area beside Bull's BBQ and finally have adequate staff to handle the demand...Found a spacious family restroom where we changed my daughter's diaper. It was suprisingly very clean, and I was impressed at the foresight shown by the architect to build such a facility. Unfortunately, someone dropped a toxic deuce right before we entered. The stench damaged my olfactory nerves; hopefully it's temporary...

Can someone tell me how Rocco Baldelli made the All-Star ballot? Dude hasn't played a game all year (and it's been common knowledge that he'd sitting out right now since...oh, last year). Conspicuously absent from the All-Star ballot? Jim Thome. DH, you say? So are Travis Hafner and Big Papi, both of whom are on the ballot. I guess they needed to save a spot on the ballot for Casey Kotchman...

At one point, some old man next to me was telling his grandson about Prince Fielder's dad, Cecil...it was kind of cool to see that baseball still has that magic that draws people together across generations.

-Dr. Bass

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